YOU SAID:

cheese eats me if i am a cake

INTO JAPANESE

私がケーキならチーズは私を食べる

BACK INTO ENGLISH

If I were a cake, cheese would eat me.

INTO JAPANESE

もし私がケーキだったら、チーズは私を食べるだろう。

BACK INTO ENGLISH

If I were a cake, cheese would eat me.