YOU SAID:

i even like to touch myself with a pen I stole from you

INTO JAPANESE

でも私はあなたから盗んだペンで自分をタッチしたいです。

BACK INTO ENGLISH

But I want to touch myself with a pen I stole from you.

INTO JAPANESE

しかし、私はあなたから盗んだペンで自分自身に触れたい。

BACK INTO ENGLISH

However, I stole from you in touching myself.

INTO JAPANESE

そんなわけないでしょ

BACK INTO ENGLISH

NO way

INTO JAPANESE

そんなわけないでしょ

BACK INTO ENGLISH

NO way